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Poem by Carolyn Howard Johnson
St. Petersburg Sestina
Upon My Visit to PeskaryovskoyeKladbishe in 2002,
Sixty Years After Tanya Savachev Wrote Her Brief Eulogies
Only shards of a diary were left
behind by Russia’s Ann Frank. Dyed
yellow, faded by the time
of this city’s sorrow since 1942,
the pages were torn from a notebook. Only
inscriptions from her heavy hand cry
out to visitors who, in their turn, try not to cry
so they can see the messages she left.
By ’41 Zhenya has gone. Not only
Zhenya but Babushka and Erena died
in that winter’s siege, 1941,
Leningrad’s longest, bitterest time
when the road of life was not long enough. Time
was counted by deaths. Tanya cried
only with her pen. Count them. Three dead by March of ’42.
Each death deserved a page. Uncle Vasya left.
One page more. Her mamma died.
“May 13th. 1942. 7:30 a.m.” Only
then did Tanya’s large letters falter. A little bit only.
Behind the blockade May promised a time
when life might get easier. Winter had died.
When survival is heavy, a child has no time to cry.
A siege knows no seasons. Tanya took only what was left.
What was left in the spring of 1942
was bodies. Tanya’s 1942—
May 10th exactly—she wrote “Uncle Losha.” Only
his name, his date, his time are left
on frail paper, remnants left by a child of her time.
On the next page her words cry
“The Savachevs have all died,”
no date or time--no need--for all have died,
absent evidence of the despair of ‘42
when Tanya’s words are all that cry
out, her memoir on mortal scraps. Only
“The Savachev’s have all died, ” Her need of time
had past. The last schoolgirl entry says “Only Tanya is left.”
This Kladbishe journal, cryptic text left to curl and die
after Tanya’s time, the mourning of 1942,
leaves only the city’s seagulls to cry. Aloud.
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