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Spring 2008
Prose Title
that was bad; i shouldn't have done that
by Tao Lin

to prevent you from entering a catatonic state
i am going to maintain a calm facial expression
with crinkly eyes and an overall friendly demeanor
i believe in a human being that is not upset
i believe if you are working i should not be insane
or upset—why am i ever insane or upset and not working?
i vacuumed the entire house this morning
i cleaned the kitchen and the computer room
and i made you a meat helmet with computer paper
the opportunity for change exists in each moment, all moments are alone
and separate from other moments, and there are a limited number of moments
and the idea of change is a delusion of positive or negative thinking
your hands are covering your face
and your body moves like a statue
when i try to manipulate an appendage
if i could just get you to cry tears of joy one more time

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TAO LIN is the author of four books including Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, which was published in May 2008 by Melville House. Tao's blog is at http://reader-of-depressing-books.blogspot.com.